Simon the In-Your-Face Pie Man Sorcerer

I. When Simon Gets In-Your-Face


When Simon gets up in-your-face,

Watch out because he loves to chase

Your greatest dreams into disgrace.

With his sly moves you can’t keep pace.


So, watch your wallet, watch your back

To guard yourself from sneak attack

Or you might slip on something slick

Which he will call a “harmless trick,”


Then smush a cream pie in-your-face

As others laugh at your disgrace.

You can’t believe he stole your show,

And ask yourself “Where did he go?”


The guy you paid to steal you money

Because “It’s entertainment, honey,”

Has found a way to reenact

His famous disappearing act.


You want to lay your hands on him

Because he made your life so grim.

There seems to be no stopping him.

The chances do appear quite slim


Because the man has earned such fame,

The crowds have glorified his name.

He has the power to bring shame.

When you protest, he’ll shift the blame


And you’ll get nowhere with your claim.


II. Simon In-Your-Face and the Sleeping Church


Alas, the church that stays asleep

Can’t lay a finger on this creep

Because they have been hypnotized

To do what’s right in their own eyes.


But then comes Philip, an honest man

Who offers up a better plan:

“Believe in Jesus and you’ll see

God’s miracles of grace so free.”


“Trust Him to never disappear

Or whisper ‘nothings’ in your ear.

The oil he pours upon your hair

Will never cause you to despair.”


“He’ll never leave. He’s always there

To heal your hurt. His tender care

Will pay you back for all the wrongs

Caused by the evil sorcerer’s songs.”


“Do you want proof that He’s for real?”

Asks Philip. “Well, then, here’s the deal,”

He lays hands on the blind. “Lord, heal,

With salve that they can really feel.”


Their eyes pop open and they see

The truth they sought so desperately.

The lame man jumps up to his feet

And sees his “bitter” turn to sweet!


Beholding hour after hour

God’s amazing healing power,

His joy poured on the one who grieves,

Simon the sorcerer too believes.


Baptism’s water he receives.


III. Simon In-Your-Face Shows No True Repentance


But does he truly turn from sin,

Into the Lord’s death enter in,

Make Jesus’ call to follow his?

It doesn’t take a Bible whiz


To read the tale (Acts chapter 8)

Which says he didn’t do that great

But tried to buy God’s gift with gold.

For Peter said that he was sold


In slavery to inward rage,

Wrath “in-your-face,” the sinner’s wage.

For bitterness lay in his heart,

To hear man say “How great thou art”


And hug God’s praises to himself

Remained a fixture on his shelf

Of personal idolatry,

An eye doll known as “me, me, me.”


He didn’t trust whole-heartedly

In Jesus Christ to set him free.

However, though his final fate

May still be open to debate,


We know that we still have a choice:

In Jesus Christ we can rejoice,

Repent and yield unto the will

Of Him who told the waves, “Be still,”


Or be like Simon “in your face,”

Who scorned God’s wondrous gift of grace.

With Philip he could not keep pace.

But we can choose to run the race. . .





“Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with a great cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us,


Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.” Hebrews 12:1-2


God’s Joy Unspeakable Silences Bullies

God’s joy unspeakable silences bullies

And leaves them with nothing to say,

For, lifting our sadness, it gives us fresh strength

Through Jesus, God’s Word to obey.


This gift of God’s grace comes from knowing

We’re forgiven for all of our sins,

Because Jesus died to save us from our pride.

Everyone who believes in Him wins!


His blood is enough to atone for our crimes.

To their scourges we need not fall prey.

When we know God is for us, then we cannot lose.

No bully can stand in our way.


Goliaths will shrink when we focus on Christ,

Receiving His garment of praise.

His overblown insults will dwindle to zilch

When our hands up to heaven we raise.


The giant’s a pipsqueak compared to our LORD,

So let him be small in our eyes.

We’ll pop his balloon by exalting the name

That whittles the bum down to size.


Blind rage feeds a bully and makes us his slave

If to its desires we yield.

To magnify problems makes mountains of them,

But Jesus is our hope and shield,


Because in His shelter there’s freedom from fear,

So under His shadow let’s hide,

Drawing near to our Savior while scorning the doubt.

Joy unspeakable shall be our guide.


Resisting self-pity, depression and hate,

Let’s declare that in Jesus we’re free.

Though tears fall like rain, we can choose to proclaim

“There is no condemnation for me!”


As we keep on declaring the greatness of God,

Hurt feelings will be forced to flee.

For when joy unspeakable enters our hearts

We’ll know that in Christ we are free.




Making a Few Necessary Changes

Okay, so I’m sure at least a few people have noticed that I’ve made some changes to my website. I’m not doing it to confuse anyone, but after all, it is an author website. After doing some needed research, I realized that some things were missing with this website – essential items that help people to contact me and buy my book. (No pressure to purchase, but it’s nice to have the information at your fingertips for immediate and/or future reference).

Yes, I’ll admit, I feel the pressure to make sales. (Too few reviews sound like bad news. I wouldn’t want to blow a fuse). But that’s not the reason I write. I write because I have a message to share and I can’t type it fast enough, and then I have to think about “Is anybody reading it?”

I know. What does that bird have to do with anything? I wish it would stop peering over my shoulder already.

ARRRGH! I’m a writer. I just want to write. I have another book to finish but marketing is a distraction. It’s like the carrots in the pot roast that refuse to cook all the way through, but the meat has been done for three hours. Even the potatoes are tired of waiting for them to cook. Anyhow, I think you get my drift. I’ve made some major renovations to this site over the last few months – renovations that in some ways correspond with renovations in my life. As some children prepare to move overseas (I will miss my grandson!) others come back home.

They’re here and then they’re there. They like to travel everywhere. My rhymes almost sound like a Doctor Seuss book. I used to wonder about his last name; sounds like the Hebrew word for horse.

Doctor Horse. Good name for him. I can see the toothy grin. Reminds me of Mr. Ed the talking horse. Remember him? If so, you’ve probably been around a while – long enough to go through numerous changes.

Like my website. I’ve been writing more articles for authors and for readers too. But my main message hasn’t changed a bit. To me it’s all about the miracles and healing Jesus still performs. He’s just the same today as He was two thousand years ago.  That’s what the Christian fiction stories I write are really about – children walking in the power of the Spirit, taking His inspired comic books at face value and using them to take incredible adventures.

These heroes are like people who read the Bible and do what it says without wavering.

They’ve had it with the Snore Bore. They won’t listen to his dead weights, and – well, I think you get the picture. They trust God to help them make those needed changes in their lives, even though some things can be so frustrating – like figuring out where all those widgets go and how and why and – Anyhow, change can be good. Now if I could only figure out where my villain ran off to…



Laughter: Best Tool for Digging Writing Wells

God gave Abraham, the faith man, and Sarah, the free woman, power to conceive a son named Isaac, whose name means laughter (see Galatians 4:21-31). This was an amazing miracle because Sarah was ninety at the time and way past child-bearing age. Abraham was one hundred. But all things are possible with God (Matthew 19:26). After Isaac was born, Sarah said “God has made me laugh, so that all who hear will laugh with me.” (Genesis 21:6).

To “laugh” in this case clearly doesn’t mean to mock. It is not a wicked sort of laughter. It is completely joyful. Joy that comes from God makes miracles happen. Keep in mind, it was God who told the faith man to call Isaac “laughter.” It is the sort of laughter that sets you free to be everything that you were meant to be.

The day Isaac was weaned, Abraham gave a great feast. Again there was laughter, but this laughter wasn’t good. Abraham’s son Ishmael, son of his slave woman Hagar, was mocking Isaac.

As a result, Abraham had to send them away. “For the son of this bondwoman (slave woman) shall not be heir with my son, even with Isaac,” said the free woman (Genesis 21:10).

Now, here’s something worth noting when it comes to Isaac being heir to Abraham: Abraham (faith) gave Hagar and Ishmael (who represents bondage to law – see the passage in Galatians) water for their journey. But Isaac (laughter) inherited his wells. The Philistines stopped up those wells, but Isaac reopened them. (see Genesis 26:15).

Laughter – joyful laughter – born of faith digs wells like no one can. Isaac was really into digging wells. The Lord’s unspeakable joy must have been his strength (see Nehemiah 8:10).

Now, there are different kinds of wells: natural and spiritual. Writers create wells of “water” that can either sicken or refresh the ones who drink it. I personally happen to like pure water. I want my stories to refresh readers, not leave them languishing in the desert. But as I struggle to express deep truths I find inside God’s Word, my writings can get way too serious and bogged down (like the law that condemns me because I didn’t “word it perfectly”).

That’s when I need to close my eyes, praise God, and tap into the well of joy and laughter Jesus has placed in me. For those who drink this glorious water will never thirst again (John 4:14).


Speed of Sight Book Release

I’m excited to announce that Speed of Sight by C. R. Flamingbush has finally arrived. This young adult fantasy book follows the footsteps of an awkward boy who can’t seem to excel at much of anything. Then one day he enters a different realm and his life is changed forever.

“Twelve-year-old Pete Plain is an ordinary boy with an extraordinary secret who lives in a crazy town called Jericho. On the last day of school, his friend Jack gives him a powerful but illegal comic book—not to read but to hide. That afternoon the school bully shoots Jack with toxic slime. Uncertain how to help him, Pete sneaks a peek at the comic and gets drawn into a different world. There he goes on an unforgettable adventure.

  When Jack discovers what Pete has done, he takes the book from him. Pete wants it back, but the forces of evil that haunt his hometown are determined to keep it from him. When Pete glimpses the ghostly grizzly dividing his family, he knows he must do something to stop it. The author of the forbidden comic books gives Pete special gifts of super sight and super speed, but will the boy from the broken home fully use those gifts or will he let himself be overcome by the bitter malady known as Sadly Absent Dad Syndrome? Much is at stake, for the slime is deadly, and catching the bullies behind it will prove to be no easy task.”

You can preview the first three chapters at Dove Christian Publisher’s website,

The book is also available through Amazon

Kindle version $2.99 ;

Print version $13.95 ;

You can also buy it through Barnes and Noble.

I hope you enjoy the book. If you like it, please feel free to post a review on Amazon.


Fever Pitch: a Jesus Healing Poem

Peter’s mother-in-law has a fever. His wife is a basket case. She laments loud and long.


Oh, Mama’s got a headache, my Mama’s got pain.

I fear she may never cook, ever again.

She cannot get up and out of her bed

Because the fever’s playing ping-pong with her head.


Oh, I’m doing the dishes, and I’m folding the clothes.

I’m burning the dinner. Someone, get me a hose,

Because Mama can’t help me and she can’t even try.

She feels so bad, we fear she’s going to die.


Peter’s wife is about to tear her hair out when Peter brings Jesus to the house. Soon his wife begins to change her tune.


Glad you came home, Peter. I was hoping you would.

Come to visit Mama? It might do her some good.

And by the way, could you give me a break?

Because I don’t know how much more of this I can take.


Peter sees that his wife is about to reach her wit’s end. Her frustration has reached a fever pitch. He pleads with Jesus to help his poor mother-in-law. Soon his wife is singing a different tune.


Jesus just took her hand. Now I see her rise.

And there’s a look of total shock in everyone’s eyes.

I see her jump up, much to my surprise,

For Jesus did the only thing that was wise.


Now, you may travel by camel or you may travel by car,

But a cup of sympathy by itself won’t get you too far.

However, Christ’s compassion goes quite a long way.

All you have to do is bend your knees and pray.



Peter and the other disciples with him in the house echo that last word:


Take time to pray!



Now, the power of Jesus is something Mama knows,

Because she’s feeling mighty good from her head to her toes.

For she knows that Jesus came to make her whole,

Not just to heal her body but to save her soul!


Now, we can trust Jesus in our time of need.

He’ll come to our rescue – oh yes, indeed!

Because He’ll always love us and He’ll always care.

All you need to do is invite Him and He’ll be there.






Give Thanks in Every Circumstance

Give thanks in every circumstance.

That’s right. You heard me, Master Vance.

Instead of blaming brother Lance,

Give thanks in every circumstance.

Regardless of the – yes, I know it’s tough. Nevertheless. . .

I mean – oh, come on.


You say you blew a new romance

And tore a hole in your new pants?

Well you could chalk it up to chance,

Or perhaps instead you could. . .


Give thanks in every circumstance,

Although it may be hard because, you see . . .



Lance says your lunch got snatched by ants

And drought destroyed your batch of plants.

Your anger rises. “What’s the chance -?”


Hey, it’s okay. Calm down, dear Vance.

Instead of ripping up your pants,


Give thanks in every circumstance.


Oh, but what’s that? It’s gotten worse?


You say your boss that raves and rants

Simply refuses to advance

Your salary. You’ve got no chance?


Yes, I know it’s too much. But instead of

Being bitter, I really think you need to . . .


Give thanks in every circumstance.


Hey, wait! What’s that about the dance

That cancelled out your flight to France?

I know you’re blaming it on Lance,

But even though he ruined your chance,

you should still be nice. Yes, I know, nice

doesn’t fit the rhyme scheme. Nevertheless,

you should still obey me and

Give thanks in every circumstance.


So then, all together:


Give thanks in every circumstance

And your performance you’ll enhance.

Perhaps you may even snag that advance!


And if you bless the boss that raves and rants,

His anger will not stand a chance

Against your joyful, happy stance.


So then,


Give thanks for ants and blighted plants

And even for your shredded pants.

Behold outside the great expanse.


Consider where the sparrow lands

And who holds its life in His hands.

Thanksgiving is one of His commands.


Besides, you’ll get nowhere by being hateful.

Rather, you’re blessed by being grateful.

If of food you have a plateful,

That’s one reason to be grateful.


And if of gas you have a tankful,

Than you surely should be thankful.

Because if you have money in the bank,

Then it’s time the Lord to thank.




Admit your life is not so shabby.

There’s no reason to be crabby.

Though you may hurt when some play pranks,

You still should keep on giving thanks.


You need to have an attitude

That keeps expressing gratitude.

For if you’re kind to one and all,

Then they may help you when you fall.




You Can’t Get Healed Through Greed

 The healed man had some clothes that he

  Had parted with reluctantly,

Although his wife had said with dread,

“I will not have them near my bed.”


But he had scoffed. “What could it hurt?

Behold this fabulous T-shirt!”

“I won it on the battlefield,

And think it makes a glorious shield!”

“In such bright goods I must invest.

Believe me, dear. It’s for the best.”


She pointed to his furry hat.

“Such headgear makes your face too fat.

If being healed is your desire,

Then throw those garments in the fire!”


“They are not harming anything.

Their praises I will gladly sing,”

Said Naaman, though he had no peace.

While he pursued a sure release

From his unsightly leprosy,

His wife refused to let him be.


“Those smelly things reek of disease.

Please toss them NOW. Set me at ease.”

“Ah, but I snagged them at a sale.

Over the crowds I did prevail.”


“It isn’t Christmastime,” said she.

“Stop stalling so pathetically.”

So, Naaman set out for the dump,

but he was feeling like a grump.

The prophet lived too far away.

To get there took him half a day.


He started knocking on the door.

“Important man here. Don’t ignore!”

“Just wave your hand and do the deed!

Heal me, prophet, with great speed!”


After a while, a messenger came.

Gehazi was the servant’s name.

“If you’d be healed,” he told the man,

“then you must heed my master’s plan.”


Now Naaman’s insides filled with wrath

when told that he must take a bath,

Not once, not twice, but seven times.

Was it to pay for all his crimes?


“That insult,” he said, “I can’t bear.”

“The idiot cap, then, you will wear,”

His servants said. “Would you be healed?”

So, from his back, his robe he peeled.

He took his shirt and vest off too,

And ere he plunged into the brew,


Removed his shoes and socks and pants

(His underwear was full of ants).

Then in the Jordan he did dip

His naked body. What a trip!

For, even though the cure was free,

It didn’t happen instantly.


But as the man bathed, he got healed.

That’s how he saw God’s will revealed.

His skin, now healed, was soft and clean.

In old clothes he would not be seen.


His servants brought him something new.

Meanwhile, what could rich Naaman do

About the clothes he said he’d ditch,

The ones his wife told him to pitch?


To bury them would not be fun,

Although the sad deed must be done.

Back to the prophet he must go,

Thank him with grace, and not be slow.

He told the prophet, “Your God’s real!

I’ll worship him now. He’s the deal!”


Somehow, he felt that he should pay

For his healing, without delay.

But God’s man said, “You’re healed for free!”

So, he departed joyfully


Yet with a giant load of dirt

For burying the hat and shirt

And all his other germy clothes.

He wouldn’t be caught dead in those!


The outfits, used, to him weren’t cool,

And yet they made Gehazi drool.

Elisha’s servant found a way

To “steal” the guy’s old clothes that day.


But Naaman’s clothes spread leprosy.

Gehazi caught it easily

And from it he could not get healed.

Through greed his fate had just been sealed.


Now, there’s a moral to this story:

One, you must respect God’s glory.

Also, if you have a need,

Do not resort to selfish greed.

(based on the story in II Kings chapter 5)

God’s Miracles are Never Boring


God’s miracles, as depicted in the Bible, are never boring. They carry a level of excitement that far surpasses any sort of “man-made” invention. Such miracles make fun of unbelief, which is basically man’s way of saying “I’m smarter than God.”  Take, for example,  the Tower of Babel story in Genesis chapter 11.


This tale is about a group of people who decided to build a tower that would reach all the way to heaven. They did it in order to make a name for themselves, even though it made no sense. After all, they were the only ones on earth. Who were they doing it for? The Bible doesn’t tell us. But oh, what blood and sweat and tears must have gone into those bricks!

“We’re the men who won’t be moved! Ist das nicht wunderbar?”  Suddenly one man’s English became another man’s German.

“Nin hao. What did you say? Nin jiao shenme mingze?”

“No comprendo. No te olvides lo que hacemos aqui.”

One person spoke Chinese. Another chattered in Spanish. Can you picture the confused men running around like chipmunks, trying to communicate in sign language?

How ridiculous it is to go against God and think that you can win! The truth is, no one stands a chance against God’s miracles, which are like wrecking balls, thwarting evil plans. That’s what happened at Babel. Mankind’s “unification” scheme was demolished. As funny as it may have appeared, however, it can’t compare to the miracles Jesus did. For the group at Babel scattered, Jesus’ miracles brought wholeness. The healing of a crippled man is one example.

Through the Roof

People heard sawing.  Pieces of wood fell from above as the ceiling began to cave in. Then someone cried, “Look out below!”

“How a I going to pay for this?” the house owner wondered as the crippled man came into view. The poor guy lay immobile on the mat, inside that crowded house. He said nothing, but his friends expected Jesus to do a miracle.

How they must have smiled to hear Jesus tell the paralyzed man, “Be of good cheer. Your sins are forgiven”!

The religious guys wondered how he could say such a thing. To their surprise, Jesus healed the man and sent him on his way.

What if, as he picked up his mat to leave, one end accidentally smacked a  grumbler in the face?

When God does miracles, people’s rotten attitudes turn to toast. That’s what makes them fun.

God’s Sense of Humor

The idea that God’s miracles can evoke humor in the mind of those who read them is supported by scripture. Besides verses such as Nehemiah 8:10, which says that “The joy of the LORD is your strength,” and Proverbs 17:22, which states that “A merry heart does good like a medicine,” consider this passage in Psalms chapter 2, beginning with verse 1:

Why do the heathen rage, and the people imagine a vain thing?

The kings of the earth set themselves, and the rulers take counsel together, against the LORD, and against his anointed, saying,

“Let us break their bands asunder, and cast away their cords from us.”

He that sits in the heavens shall laugh: the Lord shall have them in derision.”

God’s miracles are what humble and shock His enemies. Like the nannies lined up with their black umbrellas in the movie “Mary Poppins,” they find themselves blown away – not by some strange magic but by the wind of the Holy Spirit, through whom all things are possible, if you believe.

Sly Guy

John woke up at 3 AM with a start. As he tossed the covers from his pounding chest, a wave of dizziness swept over him.

Scritch, scratch, scuffle, scuffle.

What was that?

John stuck a leg over the side of his bed. Instead of stepping into a bedroom slipper as he expected, he fell over a body.

“Ow!” What was that?

“Don’t hurt me!” yelled the man who had made him fall. It was too dark to see who it was. John felt his way to the door and flipped on the light switch. The unwelcome visitor was huddled in a ball by a corner of the bed, his brown eyes lit up with fear. His blond hair was a mess. The ragged shirt and pants he wore looked like they’d come from a dump.

“What are you doing here?” John asked.

“Just having a little snack,” the man replied, eyeing a plate full of crumbs that sat on a nearby nightstand. John could have sworn he’d seen the guy somewhere before. “Who are you?” he asked.

“Just your friendly neighborhood Sadducee,” replied the frightened man. “You can call me Sad Sam, because I’m always sad, you see. Nothing ever goes right for me and…”

“Hey, wait a minute! Haven’t I seen you in church?” John exclaimed.

Sad Sam sat up Indian-style. “Uh, probably not.”

“Yes! That’s exactly where I’ve seen you. You’re the guy who doesn’t believe in miracles. I’ve heard you say things like ‘Money doesn’t just drop out of the sky’ and ‘God doesn’t do signs and wonders anymore. He uses modern medicine and up-to-date technology to get things done.’”

Sam’s eyes darted every which way. “Well, you know, I am a down-to-earth sort of guy. Can I go now?”

“Not until you tell me what you’re doing here,” John said.

Sam shot him a plastic smile. “Having fun?”

John took a menacing step toward him. “Not likely, sad guy. Now tell the truth and maybe I won’t have you arrested for breaking into my house.”

Sam Sadducee cleared his throat. “Well, if you must know, I’ve been living in your closet for quite some time now, ever since my wife kicked me out for causing too many catastrophes. She claims the negative things I said are what caused our roof to spring a leak, the floor to collapse, both our cars to get smashed, and some stray dog to bite her in the leg. She says she’s had it with me. I didn’t know where else to go, so I climbed in the open window of your bedroom one day and decided to camp out here. It’s a lot safer than being at home.”

John shook his head. “So, you’re the one who jinxed me with all those nightmares!” He eyed the nightstand and the plate full of crumbs. “Now I know where all those crackers came from too. And here I thought my Aunt Martha left them there. She’s really sneaky and she wants me to gain weight, so it seemed like something she would do. But now I find out that all this time it was really you! I thought those crackers tasted strange. They made me sick to my stomach but I ate them anyway, just to make her happy. Oh, what a fool I was! Why didn’t I investigate the source of those rotten munchies? Why?”

“Well, maybe you would have found out if you’d bothered to actually hang your clothes up in the closet instead of leaving them lying around everywhere,” Sam Sadducee suggested. “And by the way, they’re not crackers. They’re stale pieces of bread I brought with me when I came here. They just look like crackers because the bread never rises the way I expect it to. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s the yeast. Instead of making the dough expand, like most yeasts do, it seems to suck the life out of it.”

“Just clean up your crumbs and get out of here. I’ve had it with your poisoned bread,” John said.

The end – or was it?

Jesus warned his disciples to beware the leaven of both the Pharisees and Sadducees, but He wasn’t talking about real leaven that is kneaded into real bread. He was speaking of their teaching.

For “Man does not live by bread alone but by every word that proceeds from the mouth of God.” (Matthew 4:4)

God’s words only do us good if we understand them. False teaching distorts God’s words and makes them spiritually inedible. You can get a stomach ache from bad teaching. That’s why it’s important to examine every teaching very carefully to discover whether or not it is from God.